Sunday, November 30, 2014
Brock turned six years old last week. If I hadn't already organized an extended family dinner for him, I think he would have done it for himself. He had already asked Mimi to make him a turkey cake. He reminded me, on a daily basis, for the entire month of November, to ask his aunts and uncles to join us for his birthday. You see, Brock is a control freak. He is not nosy, or trying to get all up in everyone's business...he genuinely thinks that his involvement will help the situation. Years ago, we hosted a get-together, and Brock counted the people, then the chairs and came up to me, very concerned stating that we had more people then chairs. I reassured him it was fine, but he couldn't understand, he continued to pace about the house, filled with nervous energy, repeating to me, "but where will everyone sit!?" I believe the phrase, "don't worry about it, Brock" is second only to "I love you" in number of times I have said it to him. Speaking of pacing, my next video collage is a collection of Brock pacing or bouncing anxiously. These are frequently while he is waiting in line. Or watching something dangerous or unpredictable. Or waiting for me to open a package, some candy or other exciting item. One might confuse it with the "pee-pee dance" at times.
Recently, Brock received a binder with some old Pokemon cards in it. He loves this. He carries it with him at all times. He has organized and re-organized these damn cards, no less than 11 times in the last 24 hours. He nearly gave his youngest sibling a concussion for even attempting to touch his beloved cards. Previous to receiving this binder of cards from his aunt, he had never even HEARD of Pokemon. He has done this before with other equally, or even more insignificant items. In fact, at all times he has some "item of interest" that is in constant rotation, and is revered and loved. One could say he "obsesses". Previous items include but are not even remotely limited to: a plastic pencil sharpener (Mary Lynne), a wide-ruled spiral notebook (Mimi), Tinker toys (Annora)...my baby brain evades me, as I know there is so much more. Sometimes, you can find them under his pillow. Give him an unexpected gift and he loves it. Loves you. Obsesses. Don't get him something that he wanted/expected for his birthday or Christmas (even though he never made it clear he expected said item) and prepare to hear about it forever. He is the most grateful, loving, appreciative, easy to please child that is also impossible to satisfy. He wants more, he wants everything. And I don't just mean stuff. The boy is nothing if not persistent and filled with passion.
Ultimately, Brock will do whatever he wants. He will make his own decisions. He won't be persuaded by his parents, or teachers, or friends. Brock simply "knows". As a parent, I just hope I am guiding him in the proper way. Helping him to harness his energy and passions. Teaching him to direct it positively. Showing him when to accept things as true and when to push and question, and not give up. I'm not being honest if I don't say that I see myself more in his personality than any of my other children. Which almost makes me worry more about him, makes me question my parenting. What I want most for all of my children is happiness. I hope, despite his desire and drive, he will find joy in every day, for the rest of his life. Like I have.